[Why are you moving so far away when she needs to crumble back on you? Oh, was it the pushing? Should she not do that?
She steps forward, wrapping her arms around him as tightly as she can and burying her head against his neck. Her body shakes. There's a lot of unsatisfied energy there that needs to come out or be contained. She wants to destroy things. She wants to be held. The inner conflict is real. And she's just waking up to this. The others lived through it. They struggled and worked and watched people die around them. Watched a planet die. And Kurt's last words were about being the reason their world died? Why? Why did he tell her that then? Was it even true? Did he think she was some wild animal he nursed back to health and had to be mean to so she'd go live in the wild again instead of wanting to be with him?]
He can't be dead! I need to yell at him and hit him repeatedly! [Her voice is also a conflicted mix of anger and sorrow with a dash of desperation.]
He hugs her again--cautiously at first, more securely once it seems like she's not going to push away again. There aren't a lot of worse things to wake up to than dead friends.]
Maybe he will come back and you'll have an opportunity to do both of those things. [People didn't usually stay dead in the City or in MarinaNova. Weirder things than coming back from the dead happen all the time.]
[That jars her. She hadn't considered it. At least not recently. Sure, Marina did that at the end, but it hadn't always. Most of the time she was there when people died they stayed dead. The graveyard had marked people who'd never come back. But they could. They always could bring them back. They were always there in storage.]
...Wait, does that happen here? Do people come back?
[She'd never heard of someone dying. She'd asked a few times early on, but those people hadn't known and couldn't remember anyone dying. And then things seemed so peaceful most of the time it didn't feel relevant anymore. It's pretty freaking relevant now though.]
I have no idea, but since it was possible in both of the two prisons I was in previously...
[Not that he's going to get his hopes up--better to assume that Kurt and Looma are permanently dead than to believe that they will come back--and he doesn't want to get Kitty's hopes up, either. The possibility just seems worth mentioning.]
How long has it been? Who else? [Or was it only Remy and Kurt? X-Men making a final stand. Never mind the part where she hasn't heard Laura's name yet or that Remy was never an X-Man in his world.]
Nine days. There were others... Looma Red-Wind. Furiosa and Max, although I didn't know them. Those are the names that I've heard. [It's been oddly hard to verify who didn't make it. Everyone was scattered initially with so many of them on the space station.]
[She had never spoken to Max but was vaguely aware of him. There'd been a brief exchange with Looma. She knew Furiosa a little better. Tyrion would be hurting. Assuming he's still here. She nods slowly.]
Nine days seems like a long time. [At least it did when Marina brought people back the next day and she doesn't know how it works or if it works here. She shouldn't get her hopes up, but it's also hard to believe they're just gone. Kurt was home. And...a traitor? Kind of? She closes her eyes and squeezes more tightly to Chekov.]
[Tyrion is most definitely here! Not everyone is dead!]
It is. [As far as time spent being dead goes. It hasn't felt long at all; the six days after the meteor hit had been almost as busy as the six days leading up to it. That doesn't mean that it's impossible for them to come back, though. People don't usually wake up from comas after two months and here's Kitty.
He tries to convey some reassurance via hugging since there aren't a lot of reassuring things to say. You had no control over that, you know that.
I don't mind as long as you know that it's irrational guilt. [They can stand here until she runs out of guilt, it's cool. Probably no one will need either of them for the next few hundred years.]
I know. [For what it's worth she knows the guilt over her parents' deaths is irrational too, but it's still something she deals with. She finds her guilt over her students' deaths pretty rational though.
They would be standing here a long time. Instead she slowly pulls away, taking a seat on the bed, leaving room for him.] Kurt and Remy...
What am I supposed to do? [Anytime someone died before she could just...fight something or someone whether it helped directly or not.]
[If they can find a way to do that and bottle it they'll make millions! Or is it billions or trillions with future inflation?]
Is there anything else I should know? Did a fever come through and wipe out all the puppies or did pizza get banned on the ships? You know, something more upbeat than the only person you know from home is dead.
No, no... I don't think so. Seeker is fine, pizza exists. [What else? Two months is a long time. He already mentioned Chloe and Kirk.] I wish that I could have had better news for you.
[No, seriously. It's a terrible way for her to wake up and it's not a fun way to spend time with someone he really missed.]
Thank you for considering that good news. [He reaches over to grab her hand and give it a squeeze. Now that the initial shock of everything being the worst is over, Kitty might notice a fist-sized bruise on his jaw that's in the final green-and-yellow stage of healing.] Tyrion is still here as well, I know that. I spoke with him shortly after the meteor.
Of course it is. [She squeezes his hand back.] Good. [Though she isn't sure what else to say. It's nice that Chekov pointed it out to her because he is a close friend and she wants to be sure he's okay too, but sometimes it feels like Chekov's way of saying, "you probably want to know more about that person than me." She hopes not.
Of course, almost as if reading brackets, Kitty notices the discoloration on her friend's jaw. She lifts her hand up to touch just outside the injured region still touching him gingerly with care.] What happened?
[He was just trying to think of other good things and, since he also happens to like knowing that Tyrion is alive, that one came to mind! But there could be some insecurities manifesting unconsciously there. Chekov realizes that the spot he occupies in Kitty's life isn't as prominent as that which she occupies in his. There are a lot of people here who are at least as important to her as he is.
But stupid injuries, this is a safe and lighthearted subject!] A Lyukian who didn't find my logic as persuasive as I did. It's fine, I took that as a sign that directing civilians was not my calling and returned to less dangerous duties.
[Fewer today than nine days ago or back in May.] You were trying to save his life and he hit you? What are you trying to be an X-Man? [It's a joke or at least joke adjacent.]
Not trying, and I think that an X-Man would have been intimidating enough to prevent the situation from devolving into a brawl. [It's almost impossible to believe that Chekov wouldn't command the respect of panicked strangers who are already working themselves up to a fight, isn't it?]
You did your best. I wasn't there but I can't imagine a world where you don't do your best on something. Tensions were high. Things happen. You course correct.
[He does not point out that his best was, as it often is, not enough because that's just gratuitous self-pity right there. He'll focus on the part where what Kitty said was very kind instead.]
I'm glad that you were not there. You and Kirk both. No one was eating, sleeping, taking care of themselves... you would have been as bad as the worst of them, I'm certain.
Have you considered something between extremes? I have heard that moderation is worth trying. [More seriously:] Please never sleep for two months again, no matter how bored you are here [not that bored is usually an issue] or how behind on your sleep you are.
You know, I never had. Extreme kind of works for me, but if you're concerned I guess I could try to ramp it down. [She takes his hand and gives it a supportive squeeze. The next words are softer.]
I can't believe they're gone...like that. [She had braced herself for people disappearing in the time elapsed. She wasn't ready for death. It's almost...funny? She used to be ready for that all the time. She tried to be steel inside the way her husband was outside when she'd get the news. But it never really worked. As soon as there was time it all caught up with her.]
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[Action]
She steps forward, wrapping her arms around him as tightly as she can and burying her head against his neck. Her body shakes. There's a lot of unsatisfied energy there that needs to come out or be contained. She wants to destroy things. She wants to be held. The inner conflict is real. And she's just waking up to this. The others lived through it. They struggled and worked and watched people die around them. Watched a planet die. And Kurt's last words were about being the reason their world died? Why? Why did he tell her that then? Was it even true? Did he think she was some wild animal he nursed back to health and had to be mean to so she'd go live in the wild again instead of wanting to be with him?]
He can't be dead! I need to yell at him and hit him repeatedly! [Her voice is also a conflicted mix of anger and sorrow with a dash of desperation.]
[Action]
He hugs her again--cautiously at first, more securely once it seems like she's not going to push away again. There aren't a lot of worse things to wake up to than dead friends.]
Maybe he will come back and you'll have an opportunity to do both of those things. [People didn't usually stay dead in the City or in MarinaNova. Weirder things than coming back from the dead happen all the time.]
[Action]
...Wait, does that happen here? Do people come back?
[She'd never heard of someone dying. She'd asked a few times early on, but those people hadn't known and couldn't remember anyone dying. And then things seemed so peaceful most of the time it didn't feel relevant anymore. It's pretty freaking relevant now though.]
[Action]
[Not that he's going to get his hopes up--better to assume that Kurt and Looma are permanently dead than to believe that they will come back--and he doesn't want to get Kitty's hopes up, either. The possibility just seems worth mentioning.]
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Nine days seems like a long time. [At least it did when Marina brought people back the next day and she doesn't know how it works or if it works here. She shouldn't get her hopes up, but it's also hard to believe they're just gone. Kurt was home. And...a traitor? Kind of? She closes her eyes and squeezes more tightly to Chekov.]
I should have been here.
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It is. [As far as time spent being dead goes. It hasn't felt long at all; the six days after the meteor hit had been almost as busy as the six days leading up to it. That doesn't mean that it's impossible for them to come back, though. People don't usually wake up from comas after two months and here's Kitty.
He tries to convey some reassurance via hugging since there aren't a lot of reassuring things to say. You had no control over that, you know that.
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They would be standing here a long time. Instead she slowly pulls away, taking a seat on the bed, leaving room for him.] Kurt and Remy...
What am I supposed to do? [Anytime someone died before she could just...fight something or someone whether it helped directly or not.]
[Action]
He sits next to her on the bed.]
I don't know. Talk to everyone who has missed you, probably. Eventually.
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Is there anything else I should know? Did a fever come through and wipe out all the puppies or did pizza get banned on the ships? You know, something more upbeat than the only person you know from home is dead.
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[No, seriously. It's a terrible way for her to wake up and it's not a fun way to spend time with someone he really missed.]
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Of course, almost as if reading brackets, Kitty notices the discoloration on her friend's jaw. She lifts her hand up to touch just outside the injured region still touching him gingerly with care.] What happened?
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But stupid injuries, this is a safe and lighthearted subject!] A Lyukian who didn't find my logic as persuasive as I did. It's fine, I took that as a sign that directing civilians was not my calling and returned to less dangerous duties.
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Not trying, and I think that an X-Man would have been intimidating enough to prevent the situation from devolving into a brawl. [It's almost impossible to believe that Chekov wouldn't command the respect of panicked strangers who are already working themselves up to a fight, isn't it?]
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You did your best. I wasn't there but I can't imagine a world where you don't do your best on something. Tensions were high. Things happen. You course correct.
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I'm glad that you were not there. You and Kirk both. No one was eating, sleeping, taking care of themselves... you would have been as bad as the worst of them, I'm certain.
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I can't believe they're gone...like that. [She had braced herself for people disappearing in the time elapsed. She wasn't ready for death. It's almost...funny? She used to be ready for that all the time. She tried to be steel inside the way her husband was outside when she'd get the news. But it never really worked. As soon as there was time it all caught up with her.]
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