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IC Contact (Drift Fleet)
Sep. 19th, 2020 06:16 pmAction ☀ Text ☀ Video ☀ Voicemail
Years and years ago, when it had been time to leave the City, Pavel Chekov had shared one of his favorite sayings from home on the network:
If all the options are bad, choose the one that hurts the least.
He'd been fairly optimistic then in the face of bad options--sad, of course, to say goodbye to his friends and those who had become more like family, but pleased that he'd get to keep his memories of the City. Saying goodbye does not erase someone from your life, he'd said, confident and nineteen and too young to wonder if holding on to people after they were gone might be less than ideal.
And, back then, he hadn't been alone. Isaak Sirko was going to cheat death and return home with him. The Ukrainian was going to put his life of crime behind him and open a bar in the twenty-third century.
(It hadn't worked. Pavel had ended up in Marina, and he hasn't seen Isaak since.)
It's been at least six years since he left the City--maybe as many as nine, if Pavel's suspicions about how time operated in MarinaNova are correct--and the years have not been terribly kind. Pavel has lost more friends than the seventeen year-old version of him that first entered the City could have imagined he would ever have. On the rare occasion that people returned, it was never with all of their memories. Crew mates came and went--six times, in Kirk's case--and had not always been eager to embrace Chekov as he was. He has fallen in love three times; all three times, it ended with her leaving (or, in Kitty's case, him leaving and finding a different version of her). If nothing else, the years have taught him that love and acceptance are never guaranteed.
So now, six (or nine) years after leaving the City, Pavel is ready to leave the Fleet. He doesn't bother making a public post on the network. He has no words of wisdom or optimism, and even if he did, there are very few friends left to share such things with. Not enough friends to warrant a broadcast.
Even though he still doesn't know where 'home' is, he has decided that he will return to his original universe. Maybe his crew won't want him there, and maybe he's no longer officer material, but that's where his father is. Andrei Chekov is the one person who asked Pavel to stay, years and years ago when he had been fourteen and determined to join Starfleet. Pavel had left, of course, and their relationship had remained icy. Civil, but not warm. He owes his father a conversation, at the very least.
Maybe, once he's back, he'll quit Starfleet. He could become a professor like his mother had been, or he could work in the shipyards like Andrei.
Or maybe he'll stay with Starfleet and hope that an apology and promise to visit will be enough to mend things with his father. Maybe he'll have a chance to do something brave and heroic. Pavel has always wanted to be a hero; that hasn't changed in his years in other universes.
Or maybe, whether he stays with the fleet or not, he'll uncover the secrets of controlled intra-universal travel. He could visit the near future in the version of his own universe where Nero didn't destroy Vulcan and find the Voyager. Janeway and Chakotay and Harry wouldn't remember him, but he'd like to see them again regardless. Pavel could search for Isaak. He could scour the universes for the friends that he has lost--see how Howl and Sophie are doing, if Peter Vincent is still drunk somewhere, if Korra and Hei are together or if that inadvisable team-up fell apart. He'd look for Tessa and Ginny and Delacroix and Doc Brown, and Doc Brown would be impressed with his innovations and understand the science behind it.
He would check in on Lucy. For the last six (nine?) years, he has hoped that she was able to find happiness at home. He likely wouldn't talk to her if he found her; nothing good would come of that. But he'd like to know how she's doing.
He'd say hello to Kara and meet her sister. He'd track down Felix Gaeta and offer him a new identity in the twenty-third century. He'd go see a live Walkure concert.
Maybe he would stumble across another version of himself--a Pavel who did make it home with Isaak after the City, or a Pavel who stayed with Kitty in Marina. Or maybe it would be best if he didn't know how his life would have gone, had things been different. Maybe it's best just to imagine that those Pavels are happy.
He doesn't know what will happen once he returns to his own universe. He isn't even convinced that he'll make it back there; his last attempt to go home, after all, led to MarinaNova. Even if he makes it back, neither the hosts nor the Interceptors guaranteed that they would keep their memories.
Forgetting would be a kindness, but Pavel hopes he remembers.
If all the options are bad, choose the one that hurts the least.
He'd been fairly optimistic then in the face of bad options--sad, of course, to say goodbye to his friends and those who had become more like family, but pleased that he'd get to keep his memories of the City. Saying goodbye does not erase someone from your life, he'd said, confident and nineteen and too young to wonder if holding on to people after they were gone might be less than ideal.
And, back then, he hadn't been alone. Isaak Sirko was going to cheat death and return home with him. The Ukrainian was going to put his life of crime behind him and open a bar in the twenty-third century.
(It hadn't worked. Pavel had ended up in Marina, and he hasn't seen Isaak since.)
It's been at least six years since he left the City--maybe as many as nine, if Pavel's suspicions about how time operated in MarinaNova are correct--and the years have not been terribly kind. Pavel has lost more friends than the seventeen year-old version of him that first entered the City could have imagined he would ever have. On the rare occasion that people returned, it was never with all of their memories. Crew mates came and went--six times, in Kirk's case--and had not always been eager to embrace Chekov as he was. He has fallen in love three times; all three times, it ended with her leaving (or, in Kitty's case, him leaving and finding a different version of her). If nothing else, the years have taught him that love and acceptance are never guaranteed.
So now, six (or nine) years after leaving the City, Pavel is ready to leave the Fleet. He doesn't bother making a public post on the network. He has no words of wisdom or optimism, and even if he did, there are very few friends left to share such things with. Not enough friends to warrant a broadcast.
Even though he still doesn't know where 'home' is, he has decided that he will return to his original universe. Maybe his crew won't want him there, and maybe he's no longer officer material, but that's where his father is. Andrei Chekov is the one person who asked Pavel to stay, years and years ago when he had been fourteen and determined to join Starfleet. Pavel had left, of course, and their relationship had remained icy. Civil, but not warm. He owes his father a conversation, at the very least.
Maybe, once he's back, he'll quit Starfleet. He could become a professor like his mother had been, or he could work in the shipyards like Andrei.
Or maybe he'll stay with Starfleet and hope that an apology and promise to visit will be enough to mend things with his father. Maybe he'll have a chance to do something brave and heroic. Pavel has always wanted to be a hero; that hasn't changed in his years in other universes.
Or maybe, whether he stays with the fleet or not, he'll uncover the secrets of controlled intra-universal travel. He could visit the near future in the version of his own universe where Nero didn't destroy Vulcan and find the Voyager. Janeway and Chakotay and Harry wouldn't remember him, but he'd like to see them again regardless. Pavel could search for Isaak. He could scour the universes for the friends that he has lost--see how Howl and Sophie are doing, if Peter Vincent is still drunk somewhere, if Korra and Hei are together or if that inadvisable team-up fell apart. He'd look for Tessa and Ginny and Delacroix and Doc Brown, and Doc Brown would be impressed with his innovations and understand the science behind it.
He would check in on Lucy. For the last six (nine?) years, he has hoped that she was able to find happiness at home. He likely wouldn't talk to her if he found her; nothing good would come of that. But he'd like to know how she's doing.
He'd say hello to Kara and meet her sister. He'd track down Felix Gaeta and offer him a new identity in the twenty-third century. He'd go see a live Walkure concert.
Maybe he would stumble across another version of himself--a Pavel who did make it home with Isaak after the City, or a Pavel who stayed with Kitty in Marina. Or maybe it would be best if he didn't know how his life would have gone, had things been different. Maybe it's best just to imagine that those Pavels are happy.
He doesn't know what will happen once he returns to his own universe. He isn't even convinced that he'll make it back there; his last attempt to go home, after all, led to MarinaNova. Even if he makes it back, neither the hosts nor the Interceptors guaranteed that they would keep their memories.
Forgetting would be a kindness, but Pavel hopes he remembers.
Personal Items
Mar. 26th, 2019 01:03 amFrom the Eyuzi System
- A detailed star chart (featuring a pretty illustration of the planet Lyuku and the moon Eynewa).
- Some lovely blue rocks (said to signify hope and strength).
Gifts
- A set of nesting dolls from Kitty.
- A blue blanket from Kitty.
- A detailed star chart (featuring a pretty illustration of the planet Lyuku and the moon Eynewa).
- Some lovely blue rocks (said to signify hope and strength).
Gifts
- A set of nesting dolls from Kitty.
- A blue blanket from Kitty.
Calibrations 2.0
Jan. 21st, 2019 05:48 pmCHILDHOOD
Trigger: An old-fashioned paper book
Source: Headcanon
Contains: A Russian fairytale, Chekov's Dead Mom (except she's alive and fine!), fluff
That time Chekov's childhood actually looked pretty normal.
Trigger: Starfleet Academy rejection letter
Source: Headcanon
Contains: Fluff, a sassy child, an unamused Starfleet official
That time Chekov was miffed because eleven is apparently too young for Starfleet Academy.
ACADEMY
Trigger: PADD
Source: Headcanon
Contains: Fluff, allusions to bullying, references to Fake Science
That time Chekov made a friend.
Trigger: Communicator
Source: Extended universe (The Gemini Agent)
Contains: Attempted murder of a minor, peril
That time Chekov was almost murdered at the Academy.
Trigger: Insignia badge
Source: Headcanon (ties in with Star Trek 2009)
Contains: Death (implied), sad fluff, allusions to Sasha the cat
The first time Chekov lost a friend.
ENTERPRISE
Trigger: 40 Eridani triple-star system (Vulcan)
Source: Canon (Star Trek 2009)
Contains: Death (not graphic), iconic lines, reasons to seek therapy
Video (through 2:38)
That time Chekov did a great thing (and failed to do the other thing),
Trigger: Sol System (Earth)
Source: Canon (Into Darkness)
Contains: Death (not graphic), more reasons to seek therapy, failure, guilt
That time Chekov was Chief Engineer even though that isn't his division.
Trigger: Beta Geminorum System (Pollux IV)
Source: Headcanon
Contains: Paternal disapproval, allusions to TOS
That time Chekov's father wasn't all that impressed.
Trigger: Orion System (Orion)
Source: Headcanon (insp Beyond)
Contains: Smooching, Pavel being a workaholic, a girl being Over It
That time Chekov was kicked out of a girl's room.
Trigger: Altamid System (Altamid)
Source: Canon (Beyond)
Contains: ACTION, RUNNING, EXPLOSIONS, YELLING
Video (full)
That time Chekov ran around with Kirk while stuff was blowing up.
ROLEPLAY
Trigger: Storage wall (undrgrnd_14 city.y2)
Source: Roleplay (Polychromatic)
Contains: Threats of violence against a Russian, a horrible person, questionable character judgment
That time Chekov had really shitty taste in friends.
Trigger: Storage wall (ides_14 city.y2)
Source: Roleplay (Polychromatic)
Contains: Death of a Russian (not graphic), Lucy, Uhura, sadness
That time Chekov straight up died.
Trigger: Storage wall (tessa_14 city.y2)
Source: Roleplay (Polychromatic)
Contains: Romantic woes, Tessa, kids being emotionally mature
That time Chekov's first girlfriend came back and told him she loves two other men.
*Trigger: Storage wall, character dependent (Kirk)
Source: Roleplay (Polychromatic)
Contains: Kirk, a stupid promise, stuff to make Kirk feel bad
That time Kirk told Chekov that he wouldn't leave him behind. (Spoiler: He did.)
*Trigger: Storage wall, character dependent (Kitty)
Source: Roleplay (MarinaNova)
Contains: Kitty, romantic woes, fluff that is slightly sad in retrospect, smooching
One of those times Chekov told Kitty he loves her and that may have been a mistake.
Trigger: Storage wall (latoli_17 df.y1)
Source: Roleplay (Drift Fleet)
Contains: Death (not graphic), Kirk, guilt
That time Chekov killed someone.
Trigger: An old-fashioned paper book
Source: Headcanon
Contains: A Russian fairytale, Chekov's Dead Mom (except she's alive and fine!), fluff
That time Chekov's childhood actually looked pretty normal.
Trigger: Starfleet Academy rejection letter
Source: Headcanon
Contains: Fluff, a sassy child, an unamused Starfleet official
That time Chekov was miffed because eleven is apparently too young for Starfleet Academy.
ACADEMY
Trigger: PADD
Source: Headcanon
Contains: Fluff, allusions to bullying, references to Fake Science
That time Chekov made a friend.
Trigger: Communicator
Source: Extended universe (The Gemini Agent)
Contains: Attempted murder of a minor, peril
That time Chekov was almost murdered at the Academy.
Trigger: Insignia badge
Source: Headcanon (ties in with Star Trek 2009)
Contains: Death (implied), sad fluff, allusions to Sasha the cat
The first time Chekov lost a friend.
ENTERPRISE
Trigger: 40 Eridani triple-star system (Vulcan)
Source: Canon (Star Trek 2009)
Contains: Death (not graphic), iconic lines, reasons to seek therapy
Video (through 2:38)
That time Chekov did a great thing (and failed to do the other thing),
Trigger: Sol System (Earth)
Source: Canon (Into Darkness)
Contains: Death (not graphic), more reasons to seek therapy, failure, guilt
That time Chekov was Chief Engineer even though that isn't his division.
Trigger: Beta Geminorum System (Pollux IV)
Source: Headcanon
Contains: Paternal disapproval, allusions to TOS
That time Chekov's father wasn't all that impressed.
Trigger: Orion System (Orion)
Source: Headcanon (insp Beyond)
Contains: Smooching, Pavel being a workaholic, a girl being Over It
That time Chekov was kicked out of a girl's room.
Trigger: Altamid System (Altamid)
Source: Canon (Beyond)
Contains: ACTION, RUNNING, EXPLOSIONS, YELLING
Video (full)
That time Chekov ran around with Kirk while stuff was blowing up.
ROLEPLAY
Trigger: Storage wall (undrgrnd_14 city.y2)
Source: Roleplay (Polychromatic)
Contains: Threats of violence against a Russian, a horrible person, questionable character judgment
That time Chekov had really shitty taste in friends.
Trigger: Storage wall (ides_14 city.y2)
Source: Roleplay (Polychromatic)
Contains: Death of a Russian (not graphic), Lucy, Uhura, sadness
That time Chekov straight up died.
Trigger: Storage wall (tessa_14 city.y2)
Source: Roleplay (Polychromatic)
Contains: Romantic woes, Tessa, kids being emotionally mature
That time Chekov's first girlfriend came back and told him she loves two other men.
*Trigger: Storage wall, character dependent (Kirk)
Source: Roleplay (Polychromatic)
Contains: Kirk, a stupid promise, stuff to make Kirk feel bad
That time Kirk told Chekov that he wouldn't leave him behind. (Spoiler: He did.)
*Trigger: Storage wall, character dependent (Kitty)
Source: Roleplay (MarinaNova)
Contains: Kitty, romantic woes, fluff that is slightly sad in retrospect, smooching
One of those times Chekov told Kitty he loves her and that may have been a mistake.
Trigger: Storage wall (latoli_17 df.y1)
Source: Roleplay (Drift Fleet)
Contains: Death (not graphic), Kirk, guilt
That time Chekov killed someone.
Memory: Lato'li
Jan. 20th, 2019 01:58 amSource: Roleplay (Drift Fleet)
Time: October, 2017
The planet may be recognizable as Lato'li. The battered ship that Pavel is contemplating, its dented panels stripped away to facilitate access to its dead engine, may be recognizable as the Tourist.
The "Let go of me!" that breaks the stillness is unmistakably Kirk.
Pavel immediately runs towards the shout, drawing his gun--an inelegant thing from the ship's armory that he's kept on his person since they crashed on this awful planet--as he goes. The Russian reaches the other man's position and trains his gun on the Lato'li that's attacking a thrashing, bleeding Kirk. Even though the alien doesn't look inclined to pause and talk it out, Pavel isn't about to pull the trigger without trying to diffuse the situation another way. "Stop or I shoot!"
The alien doesn't so much as pause. Kirk lashes out at the creature's head, but instead of relenting, it tightens its hold on him. "Chekov! Shoot!" he yells, striking the alien to no effect.
Pavel hesitates a moment longer before pulling the trigger, aiming low. The bullet embeds itself harmlessly in the ground a couple of feet short of Kirk's attacker. The alien spares Pavel a glance and evidently decides that he isn't a threat. It's steely grip on Kirk tightens further still.
He shoots again and, this time, he doesn't aim to miss. He doesn't necessarily aim to kill either, but the shot strikes the attacker's chest and it drops soundlessly to the ground.
It doesn't get back up. The gaping wound in its chest is clearly not survivable. Pavel freezes, horrified, gun still pointed at the creature as Kirk clambers to his feet.
It takes the older man--focused as he is on watching out for other threats--a moment to notice Pavel's distress. “Chekov,” he says, placing himself between the Russian and the body, “Chekov, look at me.”
He looks up as ordered, blinks like some sort of startled prey animal, and comes back to himself enough to lower his weapon. Another moment passes before Chekov collects himself fully. "There will be others," he observes blankly. "Do you know, are all of the others inside the ship?"
"Fenris probably isn't, but that's fine. He can handle himself." Kirk grips Pavel's shoulder and gives it a firm squeeze. "Get inside. I'll do a perimeter sweep." It's an order, not a suggestion.
Pavel nods, still detached. "Yes sir." He makes his way back to the ship and quickly--automatically--returns to repairs.
The Russian is kneeling by an open panel and toying with a tangle of wires when Kirk returns.
"Chekov, help me," Kirk commands. While the captain's oozing head wound indicates that he does indeed need some help, the authoritative tone is clearly for Pavel's benefit.
Pavel jumps to his feet, somewhat more with it than he had been. "How badly hurt are you?"
"Not bad, thank goodness. Head wounds always bleed a lot." Kirk makes his way through the eerily silent halls of the damaged Tourist, Pavel trailing behind. "But they're a bitch to bandage on your own, so I need you to disinfect and bandage it for me."
"I can do that," Pavel confirms, "although I think that you are asking me to do this more for my benefit than for yours."
"Maybe I am, maybe I'm not, but it doesn't change the fact I need help bandaging my head."
They make it to what qualifies as the ship's medbay and Kirk takes a seat. Pavel wordlessly gathers the first aid kit and disinfects his hands.
"Don't take it all on yourself," Kirk says after a suitably long pause.
"I don't know what you mean." Pavel makes himself busy, going through the basics of wound treatment with the adeptness expected of a Starfleet lieutenant.
"Yes, you do." Kirk's reply is firm. "Like when you couldn't grab Spock's mother for the warp off Vulcan. You can't take it all on yourself."
Pavel frowns, possibly in response and possibly in concentration. "Yes I can," he replies quietly. "We are all fully responsible for our actions and their consequences."
"That's true, but responsibility can be equally shared as much as the consequence," Kirk says, tone gentler. "And sometimes responsibility is less about an active choice, and more about the one we had to make. There are going to be times, especially as you move through the ranks, that you have the make the hard choice. Often, those choices are the ones that never rest easy with you, nor should they. You made one today when you saved me, Chekov."
He watches Pavel intently, but the Russian continues studiously avoiding eye contact. "You don't have to be okay with what happened," Kirk continues. "I don't think you should be, not entirely. But you did the right thing, the hard thing."
"I know that it was what needed to be done." Pavel's voice is very, very quiet. "I also know that command officers are required to make difficult decisions. What I don't know is if I will be able to do that. I thought so, but..." He trails off.
When Pavel fails to pick up his train of thought, Kirk slowly pulls him into a hug.
Time: October, 2017
The planet may be recognizable as Lato'li. The battered ship that Pavel is contemplating, its dented panels stripped away to facilitate access to its dead engine, may be recognizable as the Tourist.
The "Let go of me!" that breaks the stillness is unmistakably Kirk.
Pavel immediately runs towards the shout, drawing his gun--an inelegant thing from the ship's armory that he's kept on his person since they crashed on this awful planet--as he goes. The Russian reaches the other man's position and trains his gun on the Lato'li that's attacking a thrashing, bleeding Kirk. Even though the alien doesn't look inclined to pause and talk it out, Pavel isn't about to pull the trigger without trying to diffuse the situation another way. "Stop or I shoot!"
The alien doesn't so much as pause. Kirk lashes out at the creature's head, but instead of relenting, it tightens its hold on him. "Chekov! Shoot!" he yells, striking the alien to no effect.
Pavel hesitates a moment longer before pulling the trigger, aiming low. The bullet embeds itself harmlessly in the ground a couple of feet short of Kirk's attacker. The alien spares Pavel a glance and evidently decides that he isn't a threat. It's steely grip on Kirk tightens further still.
He shoots again and, this time, he doesn't aim to miss. He doesn't necessarily aim to kill either, but the shot strikes the attacker's chest and it drops soundlessly to the ground.
It doesn't get back up. The gaping wound in its chest is clearly not survivable. Pavel freezes, horrified, gun still pointed at the creature as Kirk clambers to his feet.
It takes the older man--focused as he is on watching out for other threats--a moment to notice Pavel's distress. “Chekov,” he says, placing himself between the Russian and the body, “Chekov, look at me.”
He looks up as ordered, blinks like some sort of startled prey animal, and comes back to himself enough to lower his weapon. Another moment passes before Chekov collects himself fully. "There will be others," he observes blankly. "Do you know, are all of the others inside the ship?"
"Fenris probably isn't, but that's fine. He can handle himself." Kirk grips Pavel's shoulder and gives it a firm squeeze. "Get inside. I'll do a perimeter sweep." It's an order, not a suggestion.
Pavel nods, still detached. "Yes sir." He makes his way back to the ship and quickly--automatically--returns to repairs.
The Russian is kneeling by an open panel and toying with a tangle of wires when Kirk returns.
"Chekov, help me," Kirk commands. While the captain's oozing head wound indicates that he does indeed need some help, the authoritative tone is clearly for Pavel's benefit.
Pavel jumps to his feet, somewhat more with it than he had been. "How badly hurt are you?"
"Not bad, thank goodness. Head wounds always bleed a lot." Kirk makes his way through the eerily silent halls of the damaged Tourist, Pavel trailing behind. "But they're a bitch to bandage on your own, so I need you to disinfect and bandage it for me."
"I can do that," Pavel confirms, "although I think that you are asking me to do this more for my benefit than for yours."
"Maybe I am, maybe I'm not, but it doesn't change the fact I need help bandaging my head."
They make it to what qualifies as the ship's medbay and Kirk takes a seat. Pavel wordlessly gathers the first aid kit and disinfects his hands.
"Don't take it all on yourself," Kirk says after a suitably long pause.
"I don't know what you mean." Pavel makes himself busy, going through the basics of wound treatment with the adeptness expected of a Starfleet lieutenant.
"Yes, you do." Kirk's reply is firm. "Like when you couldn't grab Spock's mother for the warp off Vulcan. You can't take it all on yourself."
Pavel frowns, possibly in response and possibly in concentration. "Yes I can," he replies quietly. "We are all fully responsible for our actions and their consequences."
"That's true, but responsibility can be equally shared as much as the consequence," Kirk says, tone gentler. "And sometimes responsibility is less about an active choice, and more about the one we had to make. There are going to be times, especially as you move through the ranks, that you have the make the hard choice. Often, those choices are the ones that never rest easy with you, nor should they. You made one today when you saved me, Chekov."
He watches Pavel intently, but the Russian continues studiously avoiding eye contact. "You don't have to be okay with what happened," Kirk continues. "I don't think you should be, not entirely. But you did the right thing, the hard thing."
"I know that it was what needed to be done." Pavel's voice is very, very quiet. "I also know that command officers are required to make difficult decisions. What I don't know is if I will be able to do that. I thought so, but..." He trails off.
When Pavel fails to pick up his train of thought, Kirk slowly pulls him into a hug.
